Twitter Cerulean EqualVent | Cerulean (@EqualVent) のツイート

I like how the most essential part of a surprise party is gaslighting the person into believing you don't care about them

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@edzelyago youtu.be/2nYF46P7B2c ChrisFix has a video on scratch repair if you want to try your hand at it

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Sometimes I miss highschool, sometimes I see stories from people I went to highschool with

Why put actor, model, singer, dancer, writer, creator in your bio when you can just put unemployed?

the object of golf is to touch the flag. but unfortunately the flag always vanishes when you get close to it

@Magnum_woof Mags T Husky.please unblock.me because i love you so very much and you are such a beautiful.and gorgeous dog please send me a message right now i love to hear from.you please unblock me like i said and be friends on twitter dont block

while it’s trendy to implement new 420 menus, denny’s has stayed ahead of the game by simply having…our menu

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lmao people don't even recognize me anymore. thas nice

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@bostonpizza can I just buy a bag of mints

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After sitting in my kitchen for 5 hours, I have come to the realization that I am by complete definition, a nobody.

hi everyone, chuck e. cheeses full name is “charles entertainment cheese,” and he canonically has dead parents pic.twitter.com/GX2RB0ntbA

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People that do 90 in the left lane while everyone around them is going faster are the Jehovah's Witnesses of the highway.

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Can I start looking my age please?

#Saanich Police are responding to the 3900blk of Grange Rd for reports of a chicken trying to cross the road

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I cannot wrap my head around people break-checking fucking semi's

"love that sailor moon was dubbed in Toronto"
"how do you know that?" pic.twitter.com/SqxQgkzjWY

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@TaranVH Does the mute prevent it from hearing me, or me me hearing it?

i don't have a toaster, so i was wondering if i could buy a loaf of toast

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The amount of people selling their Christmas gifts on Facebook makes me laugh

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Every phone scammer that calls me is really bad at their job. This last one hung up by accident right after introducing herself :/

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. @Bell Thanks for calling me at least 4 times today and hanging up immediately. Real mature and appropriate way of… twitter.com/i/web/status/9…